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"}},"showMore":"Show More"}},"contentfulResourcePage":{"node_locale":"en-CA","slug":"loneliness","title":"Loneliness","canonicalUrl":"https://v2.togetherall.com/resources/article/understand-more/only-the-lonely","id":"6Bhs4efqlAw1XEA18jjTv9","uuid":"5b88cb24-27dc-4c8e-b2d5-fb71c6a1936a","tags":["Coping with COVID-19","Strengthening relationships","Managing low mood"],"cta":{"header":"There's a beginning to every journey","copy":"There's more where this came from! This resource is just one part of a wellness program. Create an account to use the full program, along with:","checklist":["5 min self-assessment","Progress tracking","Self-guided courses/apps","Communities of support","Confidential counselling","Substance use support"],"buttonCopy":"Create an account"},"provider":{"name":"Togetherall","url":"https://account.v2.togetherall.com/join/cknhlfhrtsaxs07101lrc4tty","logo":{"title":"Togetherall Logo","gatsbyImageData":{"images":{"sources":[{"srcSet":"//images.ctfassets.net/0ids0i6whhlw/4toshnbDCG2wnUaa4f58LG/b4a15e5ac24fc1e959bdf2ccb4ef82a3/Togetherall_logo2.png?w=66&h=25&q=50&fm=webp 66w,\n//images.ctfassets.net/0ids0i6whhlw/4toshnbDCG2wnUaa4f58LG/b4a15e5ac24fc1e959bdf2ccb4ef82a3/Togetherall_logo2.png?w=132&h=50&q=50&fm=webp 132w,\n//images.ctfassets.net/0ids0i6whhlw/4toshnbDCG2wnUaa4f58LG/b4a15e5ac24fc1e959bdf2ccb4ef82a3/Togetherall_logo2.png?w=263&h=100&q=50&fm=webp 263w,\n//images.ctfassets.net/0ids0i6whhlw/4toshnbDCG2wnUaa4f58LG/b4a15e5ac24fc1e959bdf2ccb4ef82a3/Togetherall_logo2.png?w=526&h=200&q=50&fm=webp 526w","sizes":"(min-width: 263.0188679245283px) 263.0188679245283px, 100vw","type":"image/webp"}],"fallback":{"src":"//images.ctfassets.net/0ids0i6whhlw/4toshnbDCG2wnUaa4f58LG/b4a15e5ac24fc1e959bdf2ccb4ef82a3/Togetherall_logo2.png?w=263&h=100&q=50&fm=png","srcSet":"//images.ctfassets.net/0ids0i6whhlw/4toshnbDCG2wnUaa4f58LG/b4a15e5ac24fc1e959bdf2ccb4ef82a3/Togetherall_logo2.png?w=66&h=25&q=50&fm=png 66w,\n//images.ctfassets.net/0ids0i6whhlw/4toshnbDCG2wnUaa4f58LG/b4a15e5ac24fc1e959bdf2ccb4ef82a3/Togetherall_logo2.png?w=132&h=50&q=50&fm=png 132w,\n//images.ctfassets.net/0ids0i6whhlw/4toshnbDCG2wnUaa4f58LG/b4a15e5ac24fc1e959bdf2ccb4ef82a3/Togetherall_logo2.png?w=263&h=100&q=50&fm=png 263w,\n//images.ctfassets.net/0ids0i6whhlw/4toshnbDCG2wnUaa4f58LG/b4a15e5ac24fc1e959bdf2ccb4ef82a3/Togetherall_logo2.png?w=526&h=200&q=50&fm=png 526w","sizes":"(min-width: 263.0188679245283px) 263.0188679245283px, 100vw"}},"layout":"constrained","width":263.0188679245283,"height":100,"placeholder":{"fallback":"data:image/png;base64,iVBORw0KGgoAAAANSUhEUgAAABQAAAAICAQAAABTlBdmAAAACXBIWXMAAAsTAAALEwEAmpwYAAAAB3RJTUUH6AMLERMhlgBWFQAAAKhJREFUGBl9wT8rhAEAB+BfcUXi6t46dfkEl81gsr3lK1xK/uSNlChsYvBnURaDpFvccBYj2Zxk9ZUem256nyf1TFlzr9JLPfsObJm3kXrWdbxq2Uw92y4tu1LFasZYsaDMP5NKldJEfNo1cOzNtW/Per4cendh5MSLB0PdJG7c6bs18OTHjj1Hzv06dWZJ36OhbhLTZhQWfWgrRGHWnKaGZqKtpdBI/gANA3QSqvp2UQAAAABJRU5ErkJggg=="}}},"branding":{"text":"#FFFFFF","background":"#326A46","tag":"#408458"}},"tileImage":{"title":"Loneliness","fixed":{"base64":"data:image/jpeg;base64,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","width":500,"height":500,"src":"//images.ctfassets.net/0ids0i6whhlw/66gnYHBwrVmB7uxSMrutnk/e36083728a03892ff9394c0ca6d79ffe/bench-690337.jpg?w=500&h=500&q=50&fit=fill","srcSet":"//images.ctfassets.net/0ids0i6whhlw/66gnYHBwrVmB7uxSMrutnk/e36083728a03892ff9394c0ca6d79ffe/bench-690337.jpg?w=500&h=500&q=50&fit=fill 1x"}},"heroImage":{"title":" Loneliness - 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70% feel less isolated or alone as a result of being a Togetherall community member

"}},"quoteAuthor":null,"resourceDisclaimer":{"content":{"childMarkdownRemark":{"html":"

Togetherall is a safe and inclusive community of support for wellness and substance use.

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If you'd like to join Togetherall's safe and inclusive community, you can create an account for free. Creating an account will give you access to all the resources on the Wellness Together Canada portal, including self-guided courses, webinars, peer-to-peer support groups, live counselling, mindfulness meditations, and more. You’ll also be able to complete a wellness assessment and track your progress towards your wellness goals.

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"}}},"content":{"raw":"{\"nodeType\":\"document\",\"data\":{},\"content\":[{\"nodeType\":\"embedded-asset-block\",\"data\":{\"target\":{\"sys\":{\"id\":\"75x40F8SN86o6p8kp0Pkiw\",\"type\":\"Link\",\"linkType\":\"Asset\"}}},\"content\":[]},{\"nodeType\":\"paragraph\",\"data\":{},\"content\":[{\"nodeType\":\"text\",\"value\":\"\\\"There is loneliness in this world so great that you can see it in the slow\\r movement of the hands of a clock.\\\" — Charles Bukowski, \",\"marks\":[{\"type\":\"italic\"}],\"data\":{}},{\"nodeType\":\"text\",\"value\":\"Love is a Dog from\\r Hell\",\"marks\":[],\"data\":{}},{\"nodeType\":\"text\",\"value\":\".\",\"marks\":[{\"type\":\"italic\"}],\"data\":{}}]},{\"nodeType\":\"heading-4\",\"data\":{},\"content\":[{\"nodeType\":\"text\",\"value\":\"Only the lonely\",\"marks\":[{\"type\":\"bold\"}],\"data\":{}}]},{\"nodeType\":\"paragraph\",\"data\":{},\"content\":[{\"nodeType\":\"text\",\"value\":\"Most of us feel lonely sometimes. But what happens if loneliness doesn’t go\\r away? Read more to understand the loneliness trap.\\r\",\"marks\":[],\"data\":{}}]},{\"nodeType\":\"paragraph\",\"data\":{},\"content\":[{\"nodeType\":\"text\",\"value\":\"When Ruth’s partner suddenly left her for a younger woman, she was\\r devastated. As well as the pain of loss and rejection, the thing she remembers\\r is the unbearable loneliness. It wasn’t just that she was living alone for the\\r first time. It also wasn’t because all her friends were paired off. \\\"I felt cut off\\r from everyone and everything. I despaired of ever having another relationship\\r again. I felt very afraid and indescribably lonely.\\\"\\r\",\"marks\":[],\"data\":{}}]},{\"nodeType\":\"paragraph\",\"data\":{},\"content\":[{\"nodeType\":\"text\",\"value\":\"Loneliness is subjective. One person’s fear of being alone is another’s release,\\r a chance to be free from the demands of other people. It’s an unmet need for\\r social connection that makes us lonely, rather than the fact of being alone.\\r\",\"marks\":[],\"data\":{}}]},{\"nodeType\":\"paragraph\",\"data\":{},\"content\":[{\"nodeType\":\"text\",\"value\":\"Loneliness can make us feel disconnected from others. It can rob us of our\\r personality, destroy our sense of social ease. It can also be very painful,\\r overwhelming, and bleak.\",\"marks\":[],\"data\":{}}]},{\"nodeType\":\"heading-4\",\"data\":{},\"content\":[{\"nodeType\":\"text\",\"value\":\"Lonely in a crowd\",\"marks\":[{\"type\":\"bold\"}],\"data\":{}}]},{\"nodeType\":\"paragraph\",\"data\":{},\"content\":[{\"nodeType\":\"text\",\"value\":\"You don’t have to be alone to feel lonely. Maybe you’ve felt lonely at a party, or\\r among friends. No matter who it’s with, social contact has to be meaningful to\\r give us that sense of connection.\\r\",\"marks\":[],\"data\":{}}]},{\"nodeType\":\"paragraph\",\"data\":{},\"content\":[{\"nodeType\":\"text\",\"value\":\"\\\"It’s strange to be known so universally and yet to be so lonely.\\\" — Albert\\r Einstein\",\"marks\":[{\"type\":\"italic\"}],\"data\":{}},{\"nodeType\":\"text\",\"value\":\"\\r\",\"marks\":[],\"data\":{}}]},{\"nodeType\":\"paragraph\",\"data\":{},\"content\":[{\"nodeType\":\"text\",\"value\":\"This is true however you choose to connect with people. These days, we\\r increasingly connect online. But no matter how many friends you have on\\r Facebook, you can still be lonely.\",\"marks\":[],\"data\":{}}]},{\"nodeType\":\"heading-4\",\"data\":{},\"content\":[{\"nodeType\":\"text\",\"value\":\"The loneliness epidemic\",\"marks\":[{\"type\":\"bold\"}],\"data\":{}}]},{\"nodeType\":\"paragraph\",\"data\":{},\"content\":[{\"nodeType\":\"text\",\"value\":\"We live in an age when we can connect with more people than ever before. But\\r we have never been lonelier. Research by the Mental Health Foundation\\r revealed that one in ten of us confesses to feeling lonely. It also found that half\\r of us believe we’re getting more lonely.\\r\",\"marks\":[],\"data\":{}}]},{\"nodeType\":\"paragraph\",\"data\":{},\"content\":[{\"nodeType\":\"text\",\"value\":\"The report blames the decline of community for this problem. It also\\r highlights changing work and social structures. More people are living alone,\\r away from their families. Local shops and amenities are being replaced by\\r out-of-town shopping centres. At the same time, we are experiencing an\\r increasing focus on work. This comes at the expense of time with friends and\\r family.\",\"marks\":[],\"data\":{}}]},{\"nodeType\":\"heading-4\",\"data\":{},\"content\":[{\"nodeType\":\"text\",\"value\":\"Forget the idea that you’re a social misfit\",\"marks\":[{\"type\":\"bold\"}],\"data\":{}}]},{\"nodeType\":\"paragraph\",\"data\":{},\"content\":[{\"nodeType\":\"text\",\"value\":\"If you’re going through a lonely period, that doesn’t mean that you can’t ever\\r get along with people. On average, people who are lonely spend no more time\\r alone than others. They are also no more or less attractive, educated, or\\r intelligent, and are just as socially adept as anyone else. The difference is that\\r they may have a lower threshold for loneliness than others. Social\\r neuroscientists call this a \\\"higher sensitivity to loneliness.\\\" This may prevent\\r them from using the social skills they have.\\r\",\"marks\":[],\"data\":{}}]},{\"nodeType\":\"paragraph\",\"data\":{},\"content\":[{\"nodeType\":\"text\",\"value\":\"So if you’re lonely, it doesn’t mean that you’re a social misfit. It just means that\\r you need to find the confidence to be yourself again. Then you can start\\r connecting with people and take back control of your life.\\r\",\"marks\":[],\"data\":{}}]},{\"nodeType\":\"paragraph\",\"data\":{},\"content\":[{\"nodeType\":\"text\",\"value\":\"Freeing yourself from the loneliness trap isn’t easy, but a good starting point is\\r to understand how loneliness affects you.\",\"marks\":[],\"data\":{}}]},{\"nodeType\":\"heading-4\",\"data\":{},\"content\":[{\"nodeType\":\"text\",\"value\":\"In search of solitude\",\"marks\":[{\"type\":\"bold\"}],\"data\":{}}]},{\"nodeType\":\"paragraph\",\"data\":{},\"content\":[{\"nodeType\":\"text\",\"value\":\"Though we are social creatures, most of us benefit from some time alone.\\r Solitude may feed our creativity, give us time for reflection, or provide some\\r much-needed rest from the demands of others.\\r\",\"marks\":[],\"data\":{}}]},{\"nodeType\":\"paragraph\",\"data\":{},\"content\":[{\"nodeType\":\"text\",\"value\":\"Being alone with our thoughts and our senses can give life a new intensity. It\\r can make a sunset burn brighter, make the night air smell sweeter. As\\r American philosopher Paul Tillich said, \\\"Language ... has created the word\\r 'loneliness' to express the pain of being alone. And it has created the word\\r 'solitude' to express the glory of being alone.\\\"\\r\",\"marks\":[],\"data\":{}}]},{\"nodeType\":\"paragraph\",\"data\":{},\"content\":[{\"nodeType\":\"text\",\"value\":\"The trick is achieving the right balance that’s right for us. We need both time\\r alone and quality time with other people.\",\"marks\":[],\"data\":{}}]},{\"nodeType\":\"heading-4\",\"data\":{},\"content\":[{\"nodeType\":\"text\",\"value\":\"What is loneliness?\",\"marks\":[{\"type\":\"bold\"}],\"data\":{}}]},{\"nodeType\":\"paragraph\",\"data\":{},\"content\":[{\"nodeType\":\"text\",\"value\":\"Few of us can say we’ve never felt lonely. It’s part of being human. Like pain,\\r loneliness is there for a reason. It’s a defence mechanism that prompts us to\\r seek out the safety of social groups.\\r\",\"marks\":[],\"data\":{}}]},{\"nodeType\":\"paragraph\",\"data\":{},\"content\":[{\"nodeType\":\"text\",\"value\":\"If our need for social connection is not met, our body alerts us that something\\r is wrong, triggering the \\\"fight-or-flight\\\" response. This causes physiological\\r changes, such as a faster heartbeat, heightened senses, and a turning-down\\r of our thinking processes. It’s our body preparing for action — in this case, by\\r prompting us to reach out to others.\\r\",\"marks\":[],\"data\":{}}]},{\"nodeType\":\"paragraph\",\"data\":{},\"content\":[{\"nodeType\":\"text\",\"value\":\"Most of us experience feelings of loneliness sometimes. But usually, we cope\\r until the next opportunity for connection comes our way. The problem arises\\r when that feeling doesn’t go away, so that loneliness becomes chronic.\\r\",\"marks\":[],\"data\":{}}]},{\"nodeType\":\"paragraph\",\"data\":{},\"content\":[{\"nodeType\":\"text\",\"value\":\"Chronic loneliness can be caused by a lack of opportunity to form meaningful\\r connections. Extreme examples might include solitary confinement, being\\r bedridden or confined to the house, or moving to a country where you don’t\\r speak the language. Or there could be other less obvious reasons, such as\\r being trapped in a controlling or abusive relationship, or living or working in a\\r community where money and status are valued above anything else.\\r\",\"marks\":[],\"data\":{}}]},{\"nodeType\":\"paragraph\",\"data\":{},\"content\":[{\"nodeType\":\"text\",\"value\":\"Acute and persistent loneliness can also result from the experience of\\r loneliness itself. This is because it reduces our ability to connect with people\\r in a meaningful way.\",\"marks\":[],\"data\":{}}]},{\"nodeType\":\"heading-4\",\"data\":{},\"content\":[{\"nodeType\":\"text\",\"value\":\"The loneliness trap\",\"marks\":[{\"type\":\"bold\"}],\"data\":{}}]},{\"nodeType\":\"paragraph\",\"data\":{},\"content\":[{\"nodeType\":\"text\",\"value\":\"Research shows that chronic and persistent loneliness has a negative effect\\r on our immune and cardiovascular systems. It is also linked to stress and\\r depression. If we’re lonely, we are more likely to drink too much, eat badly, and\\r exercise less. There is even some evidence that chronic loneliness can make\\r us age faster.\\r\",\"marks\":[],\"data\":{}}]},{\"nodeType\":\"paragraph\",\"data\":{},\"content\":[{\"nodeType\":\"text\",\"value\":\"Loneliness also affects how we feel about ourselves and how we interact with\\r other people. Loneliness distorts our perspective on the world, setting off a\\r loop of self-destructive thoughts, feelings, and behaviours. The longer it goes\\r on, the deeper it gets, and the harder it is to stop.\\r\",\"marks\":[],\"data\":{}}]},{\"nodeType\":\"paragraph\",\"data\":{},\"content\":[{\"nodeType\":\"text\",\"value\":\"The truth is that when we’re lonely, the vibes we put out can make people less\\r friendly towards us. It can also make us less well disposed to other people.\\r Just what we don’t need when we are feeling lonely.\\r \",\"marks\":[],\"data\":{}}]},{\"nodeType\":\"paragraph\",\"data\":{},\"content\":[{\"nodeType\":\"text\",\"value\":\"\\\"The lonely one offers his hand too quickly to whomever he encounters.\\\" —\\r Friedrich Nietzsche\",\"marks\":[{\"type\":\"italic\"}],\"data\":{}},{\"nodeType\":\"text\",\"value\":\"\\r\",\"marks\":[],\"data\":{}}]},{\"nodeType\":\"paragraph\",\"data\":{},\"content\":[{\"nodeType\":\"text\",\"value\":\"Loneliness can diminish our feelings of self-worth, which can make us socially\\r awkward. But it makes the world a more threatening place. As John Cacioppo\\r and William Patrick write in their book, \",\"marks\":[],\"data\":{}},{\"nodeType\":\"text\",\"value\":\"Loneliness\",\"marks\":[{\"type\":\"italic\"}],\"data\":{}},{\"nodeType\":\"text\",\"value\":\", when we feel isolated,\\r \\\"Other people may appear more critical, competitive, denigrating, or otherwise\\r unwelcoming.\\\"\\r\",\"marks\":[],\"data\":{}}]},{\"nodeType\":\"paragraph\",\"data\":{},\"content\":[{\"nodeType\":\"text\",\"value\":\"This fear of rejection puts us on the defensive. It also changes how we\\r behave, which increases our vulnerability even more.\",\"marks\":[],\"data\":{}}]},{\"nodeType\":\"heading-4\",\"data\":{},\"content\":[{\"nodeType\":\"text\",\"value\":\"Judgment call\",\"marks\":[{\"type\":\"bold\"}],\"data\":{}}]},{\"nodeType\":\"paragraph\",\"data\":{},\"content\":[{\"nodeType\":\"text\",\"value\":\"When we’re lonely, our normal judgment system takes a back seat. Loneliness\\r makes us prone to misinterpreting other people’s intentions. For example, we\\r may imagine that people are shunning us, or take what people say the wrong\\r way. Worse still, when people are friendly, we may discount it or take little\\r pleasure in it.\\r\",\"marks\":[],\"data\":{}}]},{\"nodeType\":\"paragraph\",\"data\":{},\"content\":[{\"nodeType\":\"text\",\"value\":\"When she was lonely, Ruth found that she became super sensitive to friends’\\r comments. \\\"Even though my friends were supportive, I felt easily criticized\\r and let down. I sometimes felt they were siding with my partner or criticizing\\r me for ever being with him in the first place. It nearly ended one close\\r friendship — I had a feeling of betrayal that lasted a long time.\\\"\\r\",\"marks\":[],\"data\":{}}]},{\"nodeType\":\"paragraph\",\"data\":{},\"content\":[{\"nodeType\":\"text\",\"value\":\"Loneliness also causes us to behave in a way that invites more rejection. For\\r example, it can cause a person to play the victim, blame or lash out at people,\\r or act too desperate to please. And when we're lonely, we are more likely to fall\\r into self-destructive behaviour. In the long run, this can increase our sense of\\r isolation. This can manifest as drinking too much, relying on drugs, binge\\r eating, or mistaking casual sex for true intimacy.\\r \",\"marks\":[],\"data\":{}}]},{\"nodeType\":\"paragraph\",\"data\":{},\"content\":[{\"nodeType\":\"text\",\"value\":\"The lonelier and needier we get, the more isolated we become.\",\"marks\":[],\"data\":{}}]},{\"nodeType\":\"heading-4\",\"data\":{},\"content\":[{\"nodeType\":\"text\",\"value\":\"What makes us prone to loneliness?\",\"marks\":[{\"type\":\"bold\"}],\"data\":{}}]},{\"nodeType\":\"paragraph\",\"data\":{},\"content\":[{\"nodeType\":\"text\",\"value\":\"But why are some of us more prone to loneliness? We all know people who\\r don’t seem to need others in the same way as we do. Or perhaps we’re one of\\r those people ourselves. On the other hand, we may find that we always need\\r other people more than they need us. It’s these differences that make the\\r experience of loneliness so subjective.\\r\",\"marks\":[],\"data\":{}}]},{\"nodeType\":\"paragraph\",\"data\":{},\"content\":[{\"nodeType\":\"text\",\"value\":\"Social neuroscientists believe that our need for inclusion is set early on. It’s\\r shaped by our genes and our early social environment. This explains why\\r some of us have a higher sensitivity to loneliness.\\r\",\"marks\":[],\"data\":{}}]},{\"nodeType\":\"paragraph\",\"data\":{},\"content\":[{\"nodeType\":\"text\",\"value\":\"For example, one person may move to a new community and start out afresh\\r without much problem. Meanwhile, another may feel lost and miserable if they\\r can’t see close friends and family, and really struggle to make new\\r connections.\",\"marks\":[],\"data\":{}}]},{\"nodeType\":\"heading-4\",\"data\":{},\"content\":[{\"nodeType\":\"text\",\"value\":\"What triggers loneliness?\",\"marks\":[{\"type\":\"bold\"}],\"data\":{}}]},{\"nodeType\":\"paragraph\",\"data\":{},\"content\":[{\"nodeType\":\"text\",\"value\":\"While few of us are immune to feeling lonely, an inherited disposition to\\r loneliness, combined with difficult life events, increases your vulnerability.\\r\",\"marks\":[],\"data\":{}}]},{\"nodeType\":\"paragraph\",\"data\":{},\"content\":[{\"nodeType\":\"text\",\"value\":\"No one disputes that big life changes like moving away from home, giving up\\r work to raise a baby, losing your partner, or outliving your friends can make us\\r feel lonely. But for those who easily feel lonely, it’s even more of an uphill\\r struggle.\\r\",\"marks\":[],\"data\":{}}]},{\"nodeType\":\"paragraph\",\"data\":{},\"content\":[{\"nodeType\":\"text\",\"value\":\"\\\"Loneliness is never more cruel than when it is felt in close propinquity with\\r someone who has ceased to communicate.\\\" — Germaine Greer, feminist writer\\r and social commentator.\",\"marks\":[{\"type\":\"italic\"}],\"data\":{}},{\"nodeType\":\"text\",\"value\":\"\\r\",\"marks\":[],\"data\":{}}]},{\"nodeType\":\"paragraph\",\"data\":{},\"content\":[{\"nodeType\":\"text\",\"value\":\"Losing your role in your family or the wider community may worsen feelings of\\r isolation. For example, if your children leave home or you lose your job\\r through retirement or redundancy. People tend to cope better with being alone\\r when they are sure of their role in life.\\r\",\"marks\":[],\"data\":{}}]},{\"nodeType\":\"paragraph\",\"data\":{},\"content\":[{\"nodeType\":\"text\",\"value\":\"But our ability to connect with others also depends on our internal state. For\\r example, you’re more likely to feel disconnected from others if you’re\\r depressed, recently separated, or bereaved. These can all be intensely lonely\\r experiences.\\r\",\"marks\":[],\"data\":{}}]},{\"nodeType\":\"paragraph\",\"data\":{},\"content\":[{\"nodeType\":\"text\",\"value\":\"Problems can also arise within relationships. Maybe your partner can’t give\\r you the level of intimacy that you need. Maybe you’re mismatched or simply\\r growing apart. As John Cacioppo and William Patrick point out in their book,\\r \\\"Being miserably lonely inside a marriage has been a literary staple from\\r \",\"marks\":[],\"data\":{}},{\"nodeType\":\"text\",\"value\":\"Madame Bovary\",\"marks\":[{\"type\":\"italic\"}],\"data\":{}},{\"nodeType\":\"text\",\"value\":\" to \",\"marks\":[],\"data\":{}},{\"nodeType\":\"text\",\"value\":\"The Sopranos\",\"marks\":[{\"type\":\"italic\"}],\"data\":{}},{\"nodeType\":\"text\",\"value\":\".\\\"\\r\",\"marks\":[],\"data\":{}}]},{\"nodeType\":\"paragraph\",\"data\":{},\"content\":[{\"nodeType\":\"text\",\"value\":\"Alternatively, you might be trying to make your way in a community where you\\r don’t fit in for some reason. This may be because of differences in values or\\r culture. These can all be barriers to friendship and stop you from connecting\\r with people, so you feel awkward and out of place.\",\"marks\":[],\"data\":{}}]},{\"nodeType\":\"heading-4\",\"data\":{},\"content\":[{\"nodeType\":\"text\",\"value\":\"Breaking the cycle\",\"marks\":[{\"type\":\"bold\"}],\"data\":{}}]},{\"nodeType\":\"paragraph\",\"data\":{},\"content\":[{\"nodeType\":\"text\",\"value\":\"There are many reasons why you might feel lonely. But despite the stigma that\\r we often attach to loneliness, it doesn’t make you a weirdo or social outcast.\\r\",\"marks\":[],\"data\":{}}]},{\"nodeType\":\"paragraph\",\"data\":{},\"content\":[{\"nodeType\":\"text\",\"value\":\"Our response to loneliness can make the problem worse. But it can also make\\r it better. If you can learn to modify your response, you have a chance to\\r break the cycle and escape the loneliness trap. This can help you connect with\\r people again.\\r\",\"marks\":[],\"data\":{}}]},{\"nodeType\":\"paragraph\",\"data\":{},\"content\":[{\"nodeType\":\"text\",\"value\":\"In the words of John Cacioppo and William Patrick, \\\"What feels like solitary\\r confinement ... need not be a life sentence.\\\"\",\"marks\":[],\"data\":{}}]}]}","references":[{"contentful_id":"75x40F8SN86o6p8kp0Pkiw","__typename":"ContentfulAsset","file":{"url":"//videos.ctfassets.net/0ids0i6whhlw/75x40F8SN86o6p8kp0Pkiw/696528ba33afbda23dc3d1fed522d65f/a-quick-look-inside-togetherall__2_.mp4","contentType":"video/mp4"},"fluid":null}]},"iframe":null},"allContentfulResourcePage":{"edges":[{"node":{"node_locale":"en-CA","title":"Tips for staying connected during COVID-19","slug":"tips-for-staying-connected-during-covid-19","id":"6lijSWUfXmO8VFOCki2zdr","uuid":"b4071205-41c2-4219-9c3e-1026a8ea4751","tags":["Coping with COVID-19","Strengthening relationships","Managing low 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